Does It Get Better?
─ Enigma Series founder, Dr. Clinton Kadochi
We are often found in situations and circumstances that we judge to be unfair and unkind. We feel we deserve better according to our level of knowledge and exposure. Nonetheless, we often find ourselves in places and statuses that we just cant control might nor will.
Growing up can really be a pounding pain that radiates to the aspects of our lives that matter the most. The exacerbating factors are often our expectations. But is it wrong to hope? Just how offensive to life is hoping for better things? Given the right circumstances and conditions you would do anything favourable to your desires and become anybody you hope to be.
But its never about the circumstances. Perhaps its about conditioning the circumstances. Can one condition a circumstance? Yes! By actually learning it. Circumstances come to inform us. We cant control them but they have a potential to trigger a change in us. Circumstances come to change us.
This change could either be a reaction or a response. The two are often said to be the primary ways human beings approach life with. Reaction and response. As someone who could be characterised as reactive due to my anger experiences in my childhood of struggle with stammering I’ve become intimately acquainted with these two modes of being in the world and can honestly say that one is far more peaceful than the other, and learning how to cultivate responding to life is far much beneficial.
Reaction is the egos answer to life’s events. Its self protective, and often clouded with a collection of varying emotions from sadness to fear. Though some have become very good at justifying their reactions, no matter how immature, inappropriate or overblown they may be. More often than not our reactions have a nasty boomerang effect, and while they may sometimes yield our desired immediate result there is typically black-lash that throws us into conflict with ourselves or someone else. This isn’t so with response. When you respond to a circumstance you actually esteem interpretation over illusion. By responding you give room for illumination(enlightenment) and clarification. Responding to a circumstance is the hallmark of the quality of being responsible. It doesn’t mean that you are at fault but its like what one wise young lady once said, the decision to be glorious; life only becomes easy when you realise the power you have over it. Own your life. Dedicate it to God. Think of it, its your life, and no one can assure you or navigate what you feel you deserve best than yourself. Its starts with being responsible. Being responsible makes you reasonable towards life and enhances your calibre of responsibility as a person.
Responsibilities reveal the possibilities of your abilities. Responsibilities simply inform you of what you are capable of doing; what you could and should do. Thus your life is your responsibility!
Are you asking whether things will get better or why the former days where a lot much better than the present ones? In the Bible we have certain behaviours that we are warned on such as the behaviours of living in the desires of the past.
Do not say, Why were the old days better than these? For it is not wise or because of wisdom that you ask this. ─ Ecclesiastes 7:10 AMP
Seriously it seems too reasonable to ask such questions but the truth is they reveal your ungratefulness to the grace and mercies upon your life.
Men (or women) are anxious to improve their circumstances but are unwilling to improve themselves; they, themselves, remain bound. ─ James Allen
Does the above quote resonate with you or is it a representative of your current everyday life circumstances? But I know that this is the case for many young ambitious people who all claim they want to make a difference in an area of interest but struggle with making a difference themselves. The fact that you know what to do isn’t enough, if it was you wouldn’t be feeling inferior in your areas of struggle.
Does it get better? Or do we get better at it?
Growth is a decision. Don’t just ‘go through it’, ‘grow through it’. Don’t just go through life but mature through the process. Become a better version of yourself. Don’t become bitter; become better! ─ Abel Hara_You Matter.
When circumstances come to trigger change－change to become an increasingly better and truer version of yourself. It doesn’t get better till our CHARACTER is formed to BETTER handle our DESTINY. Whatever circumstance you are in dear friend is informing you of what you need to change or become better at. With a weak character, you will feel like a victim but not until you take the decision to be glorious will you see the awesomeness and soundness that being responsible can afford you.
As you get responsible, you become better at life. You’ll begin to realize that you are not the same person you used to be. The things you used to tolerate will become intolerable. When you once remained quiet, you are now speaking truth, where you once battled and argued, you are now choosing to remain silent. You’ll begin to understand the value of your voice and that there are some situations that no longer deserve your time, energy and focus.
Just because someone carries it well doesn’t mean its not heavy. They’ve simply developed a skill of handling life pressures with an ease birthed from a refining character!